How Not to Court Your Human Captive

I’ll admit, I side-eyed the ‘demon kidnaps human’ premise at first—it’s a trope that can easily feel tired. But *How Not to Court Your Human Captive* won me over in the first 30 minutes, mostly because the ‘kidnapping’ is the least competent crime ever committed. The demon, whose name I won’t spoil (discovering it is a delight), is less of a terrifying fiend and more of a socially inept roommate who forgets humans need things like *privacy* and *not being licked*. The human, meanwhile, responds to her captivity with the energy of a woman who’s *done* with everyone’s nonsense, and their dynamic crackles with chemistry. The narration is a huge part of why this works. Roxelana Waters nails the human’s exhaustion-laced sarcasm, especially in scenes where she’s explaining basic human decency to a demon who genuinely doesn’t grasp why ‘complimenting’ her hair by calling it ‘prey-like’ is insulting. Rusty Mewha’s performance as the demon is a revelation—he walks the line between menacing and endearing, his voice rough but oddly expressive, like a grumpy cat who’s decided you’re *his* human. My only critique? The pacing drags slightly in the middle when the plot stalls for worldbuilding, and a few jokes about the demon’s ‘demonic’ habits (like hoarding shiny objects) start to repeat. But the payoff—the slow unraveling of both characters’ defenses—is worth it. If you love romances where the emotional stakes feel as high as the supernatural ones, and where ‘I hate you’ is just foreplay, this is a gem. Just don’t expect either character to admit their feelings without a fight.